Pregnancy: A Love/Hate Relationship

So I've been thinking over the past few days and I have come to the realization that I don't love being pregnant. Maybe it's just my wacky hormones (and I do mean wacky- I kid you not, I threw a temper tantrum last week that would rival most 2 year olds. Not to mention, I can and do cry at the drop of hat these days.) Whenever I hear women say that they LOVE to be pregnant, I figure they are totally lying. Who honestly loves being pregnant?! Don't get me wrong, there are some things I do love about it but overall, it is not a comfortable or pleasurable experience, at least it hasn't been for me. I think about that and then I feel guilty because I truly am grateful to be pregnant. I know there are so many good women out there who are unable to conceive children and I know how blessed I am that I was even able to get pregnant. Trust me, there was a period of time where I was convinced it wasn't going to happen for me so when it did, I was overjoyed! So in order to vent a little as well as show my gratitude, I have complied a list of things I love & hate about being pregnant. I'll start with the bad...

Things I don't love about being pregnant:

1- The sickness. I think back to my first trimester and cringe. I don't know how I got through it. I hated that constant nausea and exhaustion more than anything!
2- The constant worry about every little thing. I am always questioning what is normal and what isn't and is my baby healthy and what is going to go wrong... the list is endless. Seriously, there are some nights I can't sleep because my mind won't stop going over the horrible things that could happen.
3- The constant peeing. I feel like I spend half the day (and night) going to the bathroom. It's gotten to the point where I can almost pee on command whether I just went or not. I especially hate the 3 AM trips to the bathroom.
4- My feet swelling. I never thought that would neccessarily be painful but it really is. I sit at a desk all day so by the end of the day, they are so sore and puffy. The puffiness in general I dislike. I am just plain puffy all over. Brandon laughs at me all the time...but in a "look how cute and puffy you are" kind of way. I don't find it cute at all.
5- And last but not least, the constant PAIN!! I have been in near constant pain since probably the 4th month. My torso is so short and he has nowhere to go and so the bigger he gets, the more he pushes my ribs out. They honestly feel bruised all the time and oh how they ache. And for the past couple of months I have had the worst pain in my upper back. No matter if I'm laying down or sitting up it just hurts! There is no relief (Brandon thinks one of my ribs is out of place... lovely). I can't sleep anymore and I am never comfortable ever! I am just huge and I hurt. I guess it's kind of a good thing because it takes some of the fear out of child birth- at least he will be out!
To be honest, I could go on but I'm limiting my complaints. I need to be positive so...
now that I'm done venting about the bad (I really do feel better just getting it out!)here's the good!

Things I love about being pregnant:

1- I love knowing that I am going to be a mom! I love it that we created this little human and he is ours and that it is my responsibilty/privilege to carry him and sustain him until he's ready to be born.
2- I love feeling him moving and kicking in there. Especially lately, he has gotten bigger so I can actually feel little limbs poking out of my belly. It's fun, we play with each other all day (even though sometimes he kicks a little too hard, I really do love it!)
3- I love knowing that pretty soon I am going to be able to meet my little boy and I can't wait to see what he will look like and what his little personality will be like. I already love him so much and feel a bond with him, I can't imagine how much it will grow when he's actually here. Just knowing he is mine and that he depends on me makes it all worth it.
4- I love shopping for baby things with my mom. I love (and am SO grateful) that she has already gotten us pretty much everything we need and that it is already set up just waiting for him to get here. I love looking at his little clothes and imagining how cute he is going to look in them. I love going in his room and just looking at all of his things- I get so excited!
5- I love the fact that even though it's been hard at times (especially the first trimester!) this pregnancy really has brought Brandon and I closer. I love him so much more and appreciate all he does for me. I love knowing he is going to be the best dad to our little boy. I love seeing his face when he can feel the baby kicking and how he likes to rub my belly all the time. I love that he is so determined to provide for us and that I will be able to stay home with our baby. I love that he gets nervous at times and is honest about it but at the same time, I know he loves this little baby and can't wait for him to get here. He has been so understanding and patient and he really doesn't get enough credit. I love that we are starting our little family and am so glad that I get to do it with him.

Ok, I really need to stop because as I mentioned above, I've been a wee-bit emotional lately. I'm glad I did this though because it made me realize how good I have it. Even though pregnancy is sometimes a pain (literally), it is SO worth it and the good really does outweigh the bad when I stop and think about it. If we didn't have the bitter, we wouldn't know the sweet right?